Hello! Welcome to my blog! My name is Sarah and I am a physician assistant (PA) student. If you don't know what a PA is, there are many resources that adequately explain the profession. I'll probably do a post about it some other time...BUT BASICALLY, I'm studying medicine. My program is 28 months long. The first half is an all-classroom experience and the second half consists of clinicals where I rotate between different specialties and get to care for patients. 2019 was all-classroom training for me. I was in class 8 hours a day - same classroom, same time, same seat, same people. It’s enough to drive anyone insane. Over the course of that year, I had a million breakdowns from constant stress and I began comparing myself to others (even though I was doing fine). Shortly after, I failed an exam by 1 question (this actually happened twice but the first time the exam was curved so I experienced the emotional trauma of failing before I figured out the exam was curved the next day LOL), and I gained 10 pounds. To make matters worse, just as things seemed to be getting better, I lost my grandfather. Let’s just say 2019 was a difficult year with many hurdles, but on the bright side, I made it to this point. Towards the end of 2019 things began to shift. I started my first rotation, began to do hot yoga, I changed my eating habits and the way I talked to myself. I forced all my thoughts to be as positive as I could and I only did what made me feel good in the long run.
If I learned anything in 2019 (besides almost all the disease in the human body how to diagnosis and treat it) it is this:
1. Love comes in many different forms so be open to it. The most amazing friendships I made this year seemed to develop out of thin air. Almost as if by accident, it was effortless. These are the people who have prayed, cried, and celebrated with me. They are my dream team and I’m blessed to have met them.
2. Perfection. We are not made to be perfect. So whenever you feel pressured to be perfect in our modern society please just remember the sculpture masterpiece Venus de Milo. It is believed to depict Aphrodite the Greek goddess of love and beauty, but has no arms. This is a great example that you don’t have to be perfect to be awe-inspiring.
3. Making space for what you desire. Be open to the blessings you receive even if its not exactly what you wanted at the moment. Know that you are worthy of having these good things happen to you. Give what you receive and make space to receive more. Use a bit of your good fortune to create more. If we want to create more we need to give some away.
4. !Failure! It is necessary. Learn to live and accept it. Don't be afraid of failure, because you will be afraid of the inevitable. There is no success unless you have had a few bloopers and in my personal opinion it builds character and resilience. And if you have failed many many times, congratulations - success is usually shortly on its way after.
5. Comparing yourself is the death of all happiness. Don’t do it, please don’t go there. It is the easiest trap to fall into and I have witnessed it first hand. I would pass all 3 of my exams, which were given on the same day but if my score wasn’t above class average I would be sad EVEN THOUGH I PASSED. I studied so hard and would be sad instead of celebrating how I reached another milestone. Outlook is everything: you will never be the absolute best at something let's face it, but you won’t be the worst either. The solution: just be you because nobody anywhere in the world is like you and that is what you have to offer.
6. Take time off to help your mind. It is okay to take a break. What I began to notice is the more busy I was with my day-to-day activities, the less innovative I became. A high mental load consistently diminished my originality and creativity. I love learning medicine, which is why I pushed myself so hard, but I realized this is not sustainable. Towards the end of it I began to burn out and my academics suffered. That is when I knew something needed to change. I began making time for meditation and yoga. At first it was difficult because I would feel guilty for taking time to myself, but in the long run it brought balance to my life.
7. Surround yourself with what you need to grow. This is everything. From environment to people. If a flower doesn’t grow where it is planted, we don’t blame the flower. It just wasn’t the optimal environment, whether it was the sunlight, rain, or soil. The same thing goes with people. Surround yourself with open-minded, passionate, uplifting, and motivated people.
8. ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE. Believe that anything is possible. This year has been the most academically challenging year of my life. At times I couldn’t see the end and I questioned my sanity and mental health. Looking back, I am amazed to see how far I’ve come from where I started, how much I learned and at an incredibly fast paced too. Anything is possible if you are willing to work for what you want. All it takes is a clear vision, a plan, purposeful persistence to adapt and to overcome.
1. Love comes in many different forms so be open to it. The most amazing friendships I made this year seemed to develop out of thin air. Almost as if by accident, it was effortless. These are the people who have prayed, cried, and celebrated with me. They are my dream team and I’m blessed to have met them.
2. Perfection. We are not made to be perfect. So whenever you feel pressured to be perfect in our modern society please just remember the sculpture masterpiece Venus de Milo. It is believed to depict Aphrodite the Greek goddess of love and beauty, but has no arms. This is a great example that you don’t have to be perfect to be awe-inspiring.
3. Making space for what you desire. Be open to the blessings you receive even if its not exactly what you wanted at the moment. Know that you are worthy of having these good things happen to you. Give what you receive and make space to receive more. Use a bit of your good fortune to create more. If we want to create more we need to give some away.
4. !Failure! It is necessary. Learn to live and accept it. Don't be afraid of failure, because you will be afraid of the inevitable. There is no success unless you have had a few bloopers and in my personal opinion it builds character and resilience. And if you have failed many many times, congratulations - success is usually shortly on its way after.
5. Comparing yourself is the death of all happiness. Don’t do it, please don’t go there. It is the easiest trap to fall into and I have witnessed it first hand. I would pass all 3 of my exams, which were given on the same day but if my score wasn’t above class average I would be sad EVEN THOUGH I PASSED. I studied so hard and would be sad instead of celebrating how I reached another milestone. Outlook is everything: you will never be the absolute best at something let's face it, but you won’t be the worst either. The solution: just be you because nobody anywhere in the world is like you and that is what you have to offer.
6. Take time off to help your mind. It is okay to take a break. What I began to notice is the more busy I was with my day-to-day activities, the less innovative I became. A high mental load consistently diminished my originality and creativity. I love learning medicine, which is why I pushed myself so hard, but I realized this is not sustainable. Towards the end of it I began to burn out and my academics suffered. That is when I knew something needed to change. I began making time for meditation and yoga. At first it was difficult because I would feel guilty for taking time to myself, but in the long run it brought balance to my life.
7. Surround yourself with what you need to grow. This is everything. From environment to people. If a flower doesn’t grow where it is planted, we don’t blame the flower. It just wasn’t the optimal environment, whether it was the sunlight, rain, or soil. The same thing goes with people. Surround yourself with open-minded, passionate, uplifting, and motivated people.
8. ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE. Believe that anything is possible. This year has been the most academically challenging year of my life. At times I couldn’t see the end and I questioned my sanity and mental health. Looking back, I am amazed to see how far I’ve come from where I started, how much I learned and at an incredibly fast paced too. Anything is possible if you are willing to work for what you want. All it takes is a clear vision, a plan, purposeful persistence to adapt and to overcome.
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